Some Birthday
by FlutterStutterBOOMBOOM
Summary: Birthdays are one of the most exciting celebrations of the year.  Too bad that Mello manages to land himself in detention, get stalked by the evil creeper kid, not to mention that candles aren't the only thing catching fire... A Dec. 13th oneshot.


**Author's Note: Who can define craziness for me? Anyone? Anyone? Let me help you out with that: Craziness (Noun) is the act of trying to write a five-paragraph essay for History, the next chapter of **_**Golden, **_**this Happy B-day Mello oneshot, AND make a study guide and practice test for Algebra II to earn much-needed extra-credit points all at the same time. But I'm doin' it ;)**

Mello knew his birthday was going to suck when he woke up to the clanging of a fire alarm.

"Attention students," Roger's voice rang out over the intercom. "There is a small fire, and while it is not catastrophic, we ask that you waste no time in evacuating the building while we get the situation under control. Please do not linger in the hallways. This is not a drill. "

Matt groaned and snuggled closer to Mello. "Do we _have _to? They said it wasn't an emergency."

Mello sighed. As tempting as it was… "Yeah, we should probably get out there. Put a shirt on first, it's cold."

"Mmm…" Matt slid out of bed and found one of Mello's T-shirts. Mello, meanwhile, grabbed two coats and waited in the doorway.

The hallway was crowded and no one seemed to be particularly concerned about the flames in a distant part of the huge building. The students ambled slowly to the exits, some still in pajamas, but many who had stopped for coats too.

"God," Matt yawned. "Next time they should just tell us to haul ass or die. Fire's prob'ly out by now." He stretched and intertwined his arm with Mello's. "Happy birthday, by the way."

Before Mello could answer, the chemistry teacher for the upper level classes came out screaming for everyone to "Move it along! Hurry up!" and other such nonsense. "Matt! Mello! _What _have I told you about public displays of affection?"

Mello narrowed his eyes at her before yanking _his _redhead closer and kissing him full on the lips just to spite her. He pulled away, leaving Matt, who seemed to finally woken completely, blinking perplexedly. "Come on, Matt, let's go."

"Not so fast," she snarled, contradicting her earlier statements. "Detention. Tonight. _Both _of you."

"Fine, whatever," Mello snarled back, grabbing Matt's wrist and dragging him away. "Stupid bitch," he mumbled under his breath.

Matt sighed as they finally stepped out into the early morning. "What'd you do that for Mello? Did you _want _to spend your birthday with a homophobic demon who doesn't understand the subject she teaches?"

"Shut up. And put on your coat. We could be out here a while. Y'know, like, 'How many idiots does it take to put out a kitchen fire? The world may never know!'"

Matt laughed but said, "Relax. How long can it take them to figure out how to work a fire extinguisher?"

45 minutes, it turns out. 45 minutes in the cold December-in-England air. 45 minutes of listening to the girls whine about how they hadn't had time to brush their hair. 45 minutes of standing in a field with nothing to do, under supervision, of course, so you couldn't even make mischief. 45 minutes of watching the sun rise as a reminder of just how early it was.

45 minutes that felt like three hours.

However, they were allowed back in with just enough time to get ready for class. Mello wondered if he was the only one who was suspicious.

The first class consisted entirely of note taking. Not fun, put not painful. Unlike English, in which the teacher decided to finally switch the due date of their essay from 'To Be Announced' to an actual date. December 14. Of course.

Matt was still listening to Mello complain about it on their way out when they heard a voice from behind them. "Hey guys! Doesn't it suck about the essay? I bet nobody's started it yet!" The smile never left the kid's face.

"Hi, Sheldon," they said in unison, Matt trying to keep the groan out of it and Mello simply declaring 'go away' with his voice.

Sheldon was a dark-haired kid who got it into his head that Matt and Mello were his best friends. Weird, annoying, possibly wanted to do a threesome with them… point is, he wouldn't leave them alone, no matter how much Mello screamed at him or Matt hinted that it was time for him to go far away and never come back.

"That was some fire drill this morning, huh? Well, I guess it wasn't really a drill… I got to go outside in my footy pajamas!"

Matt couldn't decided whether to fake a laugh or not; you could never tell if it was a joke or not with Sheldon. He settled on a 'Hm' noise while Mello rolled his eyes and wrapped his arm around Matt's shoulders in an attempt to block Sheldon out of the conversation. Guess how well that worked?

"Oh, you guys are so cute! I heard you got detention this morning. _Totally _unfair." He nodded, his ever-present creepy grin still plastered on his face.

"Yeah… we have to go now, Sheldon," Matt said tiredly.

"Okay! See you last period!"

"Don't remind me," Mello muttered at the stalker's retreating form.

"Forget about it," Matt advised.

The following two classes were highlighted by a substitute who seemed to be illiterate and class work with partners assigned alphabetically. Which was usually great: Matt and Mello, but some jerk early in the alphabet decided to get sick today, shifting it to Mello and Near.

Needless to say that didn't go well.

Nothing but sandwiches for lunch, thanks to the kitchen fire.

Math class- enough said.

And finally, last class, Chemistry with the She-Devil and Sheldon… make that She-Devil Squared.

Back to the room to write the English essay.

More sandwiches for dinner- fuck, hadn't these people heard of pizza delivery?

And finally, detention. "No talking. No passing notes. No physical contact. No horseplay. I'm watching you."

It was about eight o'clock when they finally got back to their room.

"Some birthday, huh?" Matt asked sympathetically. Because he was just an amazing little boyfriend that way.

Mello grunted.

"C'mon, it wasn't all bad."

"Matt. We were forced out into the cold early in the morning. "

"Don't tell me you didn't love the 'body heat' excuse. You _know_ you love being close to me."

"We spent the entire day writing an essay on that stupid book we just read."

"That means we're done with the stupid book."

"We got detention with the crazy teacher."

"Yeah, but if you're gonna get detention that's a pretty sexy way to do it."

"I had to work with Near instead of you."

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder, darling."

"What about the creeper?"

"Sheldon? He does that every day. Who cares about him?"

Mello laughed. "Okay, you win." He stroked the red hair he loved so much. "You always make me smile."

"Yes, yes, I'm very awesome. Now come to bed… so I can give you your present." He winked, and Mello followed without further objections.

All in all, Mello didn't think his birthday was all that bad.


End file.
